You're not gonna believe this: we found a chainsaw just lying around in one of the older storerooms, the one with the light that flickers really badly, and it works like a dream! Wait... why're you looking at us like that? It's not like we "borrowed" the chainsaw we keep hiding from Klayton to see what all the fuss is about; that'd be hypocritical. Don't worry about the blood, it's cool: none of it's ours. >:]

• Dye-Sublimation All-Over Print Shirt